Most relationships these days have moving in together as a major and sometimes early milestone. So you might be wondering how long it should wait before taking the big step of moving in with your partner. In other words, how soon is too soon to move in? In this article, we will be taking a look at 13 telltale signs of how soon it is to move in.
How Long Should You Date Before You Move In Together?
It is okay if you feel you want to move in with your partner as soon as possible, especially when those hormones are wild in the air. Living with your partner takes a lot from people cohabiting together. So many questions need to be asked before deciding if you really want to move in with someone you are dating.
For some people, it takes about 6 months, while for others, it takes way more than that just for it to dawn on them that they are ready to take the next big step of moving in with someone with whom they share strong affection. Moving on to the crucial questions you should ask before determining your readiness to move in with someone you are dating.
You and your partner have to talk about tough things like birth control, who will be paying the bills, how to deal with friends and relatives coming over to stay for a while, even to the point of who is going to be making the bed. It makes real sense to trash all these tough things out before moving in so as to know what and what not to expect to avoid being shocked when you see the difference in your routines.
What Age Is Too Early to Move In Together?
Many people might think there is a certain age that is okay for you to move in with your partner. I beg to disagree. According to the National Survey of Growth, women who are 25 to 29 years old are most likely to marry the person they live with. Women under 24 are most likely to end a live-in relationship after three years and are least likely to wed live-in partners. Furthermore, women who were already engaged when they moved in together or who perceived cohabitation as a clear step toward marriage showed a higher likelihood of experiencing happy marriages.
How Do You Know When It Is Too Soon to Move In?
Deep down in your heart, you will know when it is too soon to move in with your partner. Here are a few boxes to check so as to know if it is cool to move in with your partner or if you should stay where you are.
When you feel pressured to live together
It is best that you stay where you are and erase the motive of moving in with your partner. In a relationship, your partner should be someone with whom you can be completely at ease. If you feel pressured to live together with your partner, it’s best to maintain your personal space.
The duration and depth of your relationship also matter.
There is no definitive rule on how long you must have spent with your partner before you move in with him. However, moving in with your partner at the early stage of the relationship—let’s say for about 2 to 3 weeks into the relationship—when you haven’t had enough time to learn more about your partner’s habits, likes, and dislikes can bring the relationship to a disastrous halt.
You haven’t met each other in real life.
We’ve heard many stories of couples breaking up when they eventually meet up after a long-distance relationship. It can be easy to think you have known each other for a long time if you constantly chat daily and almost every other time.
When you don’t trust your partner
If you are currently in a relationship where you have to keep tabs on your partner’s whereabouts just to check if they are not doing something out of the ordinary, it would be best for you not to move in.
When you have different views about the future
You might be thinking of saving for a while, while your partner plans to invest there might be a problem. Before moving in with your partner, it’s crucial to resolve divergent views on future aspects like preferred settling locations and family size. This proactive step ensures a shared understanding and alignment of life goals.
This list can be exhaustive and may vary from person to person.
Is it okay to move in after 6 months?
This can be a tough nut to crack. Making this decision might seem like a lot, whether to move in or not. Researchers have shown that people who stay together longer tend to end up staying together for a very long time. That said, determining whether moving in after 6 months is acceptable depends on you. You should ask yourself if you trust your partner’s emotional space and if it is okay for you to cohabit with another person other than your family or relationships.
Should I Move In With My Girlfriend Before Marriage?
According to research carried out by the Pew Center, it was found that people who move in with their partners tend to have a longer marriage than those who do not. In the United States, about 48% of people think that couples who cohabit before marriage are more likely to have a successful marriage. Conversely, 13% believe it lowers the chances, and 38% see no significant impact.
Moving in with your girlfriend before marriage helps you to know more about her; this, in the long run, helps you to stay longer in the marriage. However, as there are good sides to the story, there are also bad sides. Moving in with your girlfriend before marriage raises your chances of having premarital sex. If your views conflict with this, avoid cohabiting to avoid temptation.
How Soon Is Too Soon to Move in: Signs
While there may be more signs to know how soon it is to move in with your partner, here are 13 telltale signs to know how soon is too soon to move in with your partner.
Here are 13 signs that indicate it might be too soon to move in with your partner:
#1: Limited Time Together
You haven’t spent enough time together to truly understand each other’s habits and routines. Limited time spent with your partner can result in you having little to no knowledge about your partner. Ample time must be spent together for a relationship to work out.
#2: Rushed Decision
The idea of moving in together is hastily decided without careful thought and planning. When love is in the air, couples tend to rush things and not take important things that will be a determining factor in the longevity of the relationship into consideration,
#3: Unresolved Conflicts
You have unresolved arguments or conflicts in your relationship. Unresolved arguments often cause anger leading to resentment and every other thing in between. This can be disastrous
#4: Different Expectations
When you and your spouse have conflicting expectations about living together, it’s critical to analyze your motivations for moving in together. Is it primarily for the purpose of living together, cost-cutting, or societal appeasement? It’s critical that you and your partner are on the same page on what you expect moving in together and consider how soon it is to move in with each other. This shared understanding is a pivotal factor in deciding when to take this step.
#5: Lack of Financial Preparedness
You are not financially prepared for shared expenses and responsibilities. Situations may arise where you’ll need to cover expenses like rent and water, and when solutions cannot be found for these matters, conflicts tend to emerge.
#6: Conflict Resolution Skills
If the couple hasn’t developed effective conflict resolution skills, moving in together can exacerbate issues, as cohabitation often involves more shared responsibilities and potential for disagreements.
#7: Unfamiliar with Family
When you’re not well acquainted with each other’s families and friends, it can be a sign that it is too early to move in.
#8: Reservations
If you have nagging doubts or reservations about the decision, it is best to express your point of view and feelings
#9: Commitment Issues
One or both of you have commitment issues or are not ready for a long-term commitment.
#10: Uncertainty of the Relationship Future
There’s a lack of trust or doubts about the relationship’s future. Uncertainty about the future could mean you haven’t spent enough quality time together to lay a solid foundation. Cohabitation is more likely to succeed after a period of getting to know each other well.
#11: External Pressures
You’re moving in due to external pressures (e.g., family or societal expectations). Family can be a huge pain in the neck. However, it is best that you do it! Do what is best for you and your partner; they won’t be moving in with someone else. You are the one, and you should do what is best for you.
#12: Communication Problems
You have difficulties communicating effectively with your partner. Differences in the personality of partners can cause issues when they move in. An extrovert will most likely have issues with an introverted partner. There should be a balance point if the relationship is going to work at all.
#13: Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
You feel like you might be missing out on personal growth and experiences by moving in too soon. FOMO may indicate that one or both partners have not had sufficient time to explore their individual interests, friendships, and personal growth. Moving in together prematurely can lead to feelings of missing out on personal experiences and independence.
These signs suggest that it might be beneficial to further evaluate the decision and ensure you’re both ready for such a significant step in your relationship.
Conclusion
Forget about the hormones that may be running wild, there are clear pointers on how soon it is too soon to move in with your partner. For peaceful cohabitation between partners, a lot of work must have been done to ensure that everything works well as they should.